Tuesday, May 25, 2004

Matt's eulogy

By Matt Vautour

I’ve gotten quite a few emails in these past several days and there have been a couple of themes running through them.

The first, naturally, was people offering condolences and anything they could do to help. On behalf of the Kane family, I’d like to say thank you for that.

The second thing that a lot of people have mentioned is Casey’s sports loves, specifically Duke basketball and the Red Sox. Several of those people who hate Duke have said they fell like they should root for the Blue Devils this year in Casey’s honor. Casey’s friend Justin, a die-hard Yankees fan, said he might even have to pull for the Red Sox.
Well I’ll leave your rooting up to you, but I think Casey would rather you root for your teams so she could have bragging rights when her teams win. And I wouldn’t want to be a North Carolina or a Yankee fan now that Casey has direct access to the big guy.

Anyway, Casey told me once that the best compliment that I ever gave her was that she was good at everything. I told her that in Chicago, after she insisted on facing the fastest pitches at a batting cage across the street from Wrigley Field. She hadn’t held a bat in years, but delivered line drive after line drive. She blushed at the compliment, but then proceeded to sing Sheryl Crow’s “If it makes you happy” out of tune at the top of her lungs to prove that she wasn’t good at everything.

Singing aside, there wasn’t much she wasn’t good at. From swimming to saxophone, pool-to-pop-a-shot basketball at Rafters to sports writing to being a friend. I told her once that she was going to be famous. Her combination of intelligence, enthusiasm and sense of humor had her on track.

I don’t know anyone that was better than she was at being a cancer patient.

Through three battles, with Hodgkin’s Disease, changes in procedures and medications, hairstyle and lifestyle, Casey carried herself with such grace and dignity. She didn’t think she was courageous because, as she’d admit, she was afraid. But courage isn’t the lack of fear, but who you carry yourself in the face of it.

Casey made you forget that her body was weak, because her mind and her spirit were so strong.

You’d visit her worried about her, but within moments she’d have you laughing making you forget that there was anything wrong with her at all. That’s a gift.

Even strangers were drawn to her. That’s why her nurses from South Carolina, who had hundreds of patients would call to see how she was, even after he care switched to Boston. Her father called her the MVP in that respect. He said you can’t spend any length of time with her and not love her. The people that are here with us today are the ones that were lucky enough to be loved back.
We are surrounded by cancer. We see it everyday and we’re scared. But I know if we someday face what she has faced, we’d all be proud to handle ourselves the way that she did.

I’d like to close today with the words of Jill Carroll. Jill worked with Casey at the UMass Daily Collegian and the two of them became friends instantly. I don’t think I ever saw one of them mention the other without smiling. For the past few years Jill has served as a foreign correspondent in the Middle East covering the events of the Iraq war. She sent Casey this e-mail from Egypt in hopes of cheering her up when she heard Casey had pneumonia.

“I've thought of you everyday these past few months. I've been trying to send you my happy thoughts, positive energy and strength. But I know you don't need any of these things. You already have the strength to handle more than any of us can be asked to bear and the inner joy to do it with grace and a laugh. You always fight harder, laugh louder and love deeper than any friend I have. You and I have always been drawn to the most colorful, shiny, sparkly things we can find. I know that's why we ended up friends in those crazy college days. You were the most brilliant treasure I had ever come across. Like a red dress covered in sequins (that you KNOW we'd both buy in a second!) you dazzle everyone when you walk in a room. From Jordan to Iraq I have carried the picture of us that you gave me, the one in the green flower frame. We're holding drinks in the clubhouse, grining into the camera. It always makes me smile and in the worst times it always gives me strength because I know no matter what silly troubles I have, you have already pioneered a path through thicker jungles. Your loyalty as a friend has made me feel comforted in the many lonely times out here. I've been too far away these past few years but you have always remained close, indelibly imprinted on my heart and in my thoughts. You are the best EIC the Collegian ever knew, the best damn sports reporter Lou Merloni ever had the priviledge to meet but most of all you are the truest friend I've ever been lucky enough to have by my side. I love you Casey”

We all do.

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